Jump On It

I am not as young as I used to be. Obviously. No one is. But you get to a point where you feel it more and more. Not that I am old, I'm not, at least not as old as I plan to be. Anyway last night we took the kids to Jump on it. They had earned a little family fun night for earning enough points. As previously mentioned bribes are the main force behind motivation at our house. Each Monday in family home evening points are awarded for such things as reading scriptures everyday, going to bed on time, doing homework and piano and getting to church on time. We also have a sacrament mtg quiz and a random nail check. Well about once a month or so depending on how well we are doing we earn a family fun night. We vote on where we want to go and this time Jump on it was the winner. Last time we went to the pool.

Jump on it is a giant building like a warehouse that they have turned into a child's dream center. At least my kids love it. I like it too. So there are a few blow up slides and toys and stuff to play on, video games and hockey tables and stuff like that and the trampolines. There are 52 trampolines (I counted) all connected together. There are some tramps up on the wall to jump off of and also platforms to jump off of, or onto if you are that skilled. It is really a bit crazy with people jumping all over the place.

We have a trampoline in the backyard and I like to jump on it. I think I am pretty good too. I can jump for like a half hour or more without falling or stopping. I often challenge my kids to seat wars or knee wars and almost always win. I didn't really realize jumping up and down in one place is a lot different than jumping on 52 trampolines. With multiple trampolines you have to go from one tramp to the next, you have to gauge how hard to jump so you don't land on the springs in between the two tramps you have to dodge other jumpers. This is a little trickier than I figured. But it is also a lot more fun than just one trampoline. I guess bigger is usually better except when it comes to clothes sizes.

When we got there I hopped right on, took a practice jump or two and then tried to jump to the next tramp. Wham I fell right on the bars between the tramps. They are covered with padding, but it still hurt a lot. My boys were laughing at me, so I put on my brave face and hopped up without crying. They tried to get to me play tag with them or do flips or jump off the side tramps. I told them I would love to but I had to watch the baby. Truthfully I was chicken, but I couldn't let them know that. Maybe they guessed cause they offered to go easy on me. Anyway I choose my favorite tramp and staked it out as my own and jumped up and down with my baby while the rest of the family were jumping all over the other 51 trampolines.

Like all fun things there is a bit of danger involved. My other daughter got double bounced and went flying, she landed on her back on the bars and hurt her knee. She wouldn't walk on it the rest of the night. In fact she wouldn't put much weight on it the next morning either. Which was a problem since she really needed to go to school. I banned missing school for the rest of the year except for the week we go to Disneyland. The school doesn't treat you like a responsible parent if your kids miss to many days. And I really want to pull them out to go to Disneyland. So no more missing school. I warned them they better not get sick or at least the kind that shows too much because they would be going no matter what. Although I should have maybe not told my first grader this, at least the janitor who had to clean up her throw up would probably have appreciated a little more leniency for sick kids on my part. Anyway so this morning I had to figure out how to get my daughter who couldn't walk to school. Even though we live close enough to walk it is still pretty far to hop on one foot. Usually I would just drive her, but the car is in the shop so I couldn't do that. So I bundled everyone up and got ready to walk her over in the stroller. Luckily my neighbor offered to drive her, so she got to school. She came home perfectly fine so I guess she is healed.

Anyway back to Jump on it. As I was standing in one place jumping up and down I was thinking that a few years ago I would have been out there playing tag, hopping from one to another without a second thought. I suddenly felt old and very not fun. I decided to be brave and try the wall jumping thing. So I ventured out of the toddler section I had occupied thus far. I was terrified, it took my a while and lots of false starts but I did it, once. Well I kind of did it anyway. I jumped up on it and then fell flat on my face. My kids wanted me to try again and land on my feet this time. But I said once is enough. I felt old again. I suddenly remembered the phrase "growing old gracefully" and I thought maybe that means to stop trying to act like you are younger than you are because doing so only makes you look like a fool. Like when old grandmas wear trendy clothes, or old women keep their hair long even when it is grey. My husband doesn't agree with this old woman and long hair thing. But old women should not have long hair, it is just not done, at least not gracefully. In fact it is almost time for me to cut my hair off but that is a whole other topic.

So we all had a good time, a good work out, and no one got lost, wet their pants, or taken to the ER. So in my book that constitutes a successful evening.

The third grade Bully

There is a bully in the 3rd grade, and he has a special interest in my son. For several months now he has teased and harassed my son. This of course brings out the mother bear in me and I have had many not so kind thoughts about this little ruffian. His teacher and I have had several chats, all the boys involved have had several chats and things got better for a few weeks then bam the bullying was back worse than before.

Well from the very beginning my wonderful husband and I have agreed that something must be done, we don't like to see our little guy abused, but we disagree on the way this situation should be handled. While I thought a little ignoring, avoiding, kindness and cheek turning might just do the trick, my very manly husband thought a quick upper cut to his nose might just shut him up. My very intuitive husband was smart enough to know I wouldn't agree with him, so he held his boxing sessions in secret and made the boys promise not to tell me. Luckily my sons told me anyway. I guess they were listening all those times I preached about never trying to hide things from your mother. You know for a long time they actually believed I had eyes in the back of my head, they still may for all I know. Anyway I shut down the boxing ring and begged my sons not to fight, or at least not to throw the first punch. To be honest this was not only due to the pacifist in me but also the size of the bully.

Well things got especially bad this week - lots and lots of teasing and pushing and then a punch in the face on the way home from school. So the next morning before school I called his teacher to discuss it again. His teacher promised they would talk - and talk they did. It was an insightful talk. His teacher learned some new information that he passed on to me, he told me that my son has promised to come home and enlighten me. So I patiently waited to hear from my son. Well he came home just like always and said his day was fine. He wasn't to forthcoming but with a little prompting from me he confessed that he had also been part of the problem and had teased back. His teacher had told me that he had used the "B" word, so I was waiting for him to confess to this. He rattled off a bunch of silly names he had called the boy but none started with B. So when he was done I asked, "anything else, did you call him any other names, maybe one that started with a B"
"Oh, Oh, you mean that one, I forgot I called him the "B" word", He stammered.
"And just what is the B word", I said.
"Well you know, the B word, I don't think I should say it." was his reply.
I assured him I had heard it before and could handle it.
So he finally gave in and blurted out, I called him a Bum" Well my immediate thought was amusement, the "B" word was Bum. Then I was relieved- whew, he is still my innocent little boy I thought. But then I thought some more, I don't know that if his teacher would really consider bum the "B" word. So I pressed, "does you teacher think bum is the B word. After much hesitation and embarrassment he finally admitted that he had also called him a bitch. (sorry to you with innocent burning ears for using such language-I just didn't want any confusion over what the "B" word was) Well now that put things in a different light. My innocent little picked on, perfect son was a foul mouthed, deceitful bully too. It was quite a let down. I probably no longer qualify for mother of the year.

So now what to do about it. My son immediately started begging me not to tell Dad, he just knew if Dad found out he would be grounded for a long time, like maybe a week. He did think that 1 or two days would be ok, he could handle that but not a week. Well I was a bit miffed that he thought Dad was so much stricter than Mom. I can be pretty strict and to be honest I thought in this situation I would win the bad guy contest. I am not known as the meanest mom on the block (at least by my children) for nothing. So I waited for my hardworking husband to get home, I waited and waited and waited. It was bedtime and still no Dad so I called him and we discussed the situation and punishment. While we both definitely don't like our son going around with a mouth like a sailor, the bad language wasn't the most alarming part to us. So we decided to ground him for what bothered us the most which was his lying and deceitfulness. He had told us for months that he never did anything back and he was getting bullied for absolutely no reason. When finally confronted he tried to avoid telling me what had been going on. It wasn't until I told him I had talked to his teacher that he finally fessed up. And then he tried to sneak a "bum" in there. Like I don't know the difference between bum and bitch. I have been around a bit after all. My son was right, my "meanie" husband thought a couple days to a week of being grounded sounded like a fair punishment. I on the other hand thought this was a serious infraction that needed serious grounding. So I voted for 2 days of grounding for using bad language and 2 weeks of grounding for lying and being deceitful. It was agreed upon and I handed out the punishment. Boy you would have thought his appendix had just burst or something. He let out the most awful scream and started sobbing, the shoulder shaking, crocodile tears sobbing that breaks your heart. But I was strong, and just told him I loved him and that he better get a book he enjoyed at the library because he would have plenty of time for reading. Then I went in my bedroom and cried.

The Ups and Downs

There have been some definite ups and downs this week. I have felt like I was on a roller coaster ride. Happy one minute and in grouch land the next. Maybe it is just pms or maybe it is just life. Who knows, who cares.

My hard working husband has been hard at work. A LOT. Midnight has come and gone several times this week while he has been plugging away doing whatever it is he does. It has been really really tough on him, which is really tough on me. I have a hard time seeing him so stressed. He is always so strong and on top of things it is kind of scary to see him so down. All this work also necessitates long hours at home for me. As much as I love my kids, too much of a good thing can be not such a good thing.

On Monday we took our car to the shop, it wasn't going into fourth gear. We have owned the car for about 18months and this is the 3rd time it has had transmission troubles. The nice mechanic told us it would need a new transmission and since they didn't do that we should see the dealer. The dealer is who "fixed" it the first two times. We were told they could fix it and it would be covered under the power train warranty with just 100 dollar deductible. I personally would rather it be fixed under the "we did a crappy job, and didn't fix it right the first time" warranty for free. But the dealer didn't agree. Well $100 is one thing but I was beginning to have some anger issues when they mentioned they would have to order the part and it would be ready for us Friday. All week with one car, I am not good at sharing. But share we have, Friday came and went with no car. Apparently the part they need is in Denver and the freeway out of Denver is closed so they can't get the part till at least next Tuesday so it will be ready Thursday or Friday. We have had a bit of snow this week, maybe Denver has too but enough to close the freeway for a week. I don't think so. Of course the closure may not have been weather related. It could have been a huge accident or a nuclear blast or something but then we probably would have seen that on the news. Anyway, whatever I keep reminding myself a week or two without a car never killed anyone.

Last weekend my baby said her ear hurt. She said it once and had a hard time sleeping that night. The next morning she was happy as a clam and said her ear was all better. All week she has had periods where she just sits on my lap and cries and acts sick. She has run a fever on and off. I didn't have a thermometer so I was just using the hand method of temperature taking and I would have called it a low grade fever. Well she got much worse on Friday so I searched our 72 hour kits for a 1st aid kit and found a thermometer. I took her temp under her arm with her fighting and it was still 103, so much for my low grade diagnosis. It has been in the 102-104 range ever since. But she promised her ear or throat didn't hurt. So I took her to the Dr. Friday evening. He said her ears were clear, throat was fine, breathing good she looked excellent except she had a temp of 102.7 on the Tylenol. We were puzzled.

When we were getting ready to go the Dr. I took her to the bathroom and noticed the skin around her vagina looked very red and puffy (just on one side) It looked really weird to be honest. I thought she was probably laying funny or something. I mentioned this to the Dr, he took a look and said, "Well we found the problem", she has an infection. I am not sure what kind, it is not a uti and I don't think it is a yeast infection, I am just not sure what it is. The infection is spreading up into her abdomen. 1/2 of her pelvic region is very red and swollen. It looks like someone drew a line right down her body and colored on one side, the other side looks perfectly normal. Weird huh. Anyway the Dr put her on amoxacillion and finally today it looks improved. She really had no symptoms besides a fever.

Last week the weather was beautiful, the sun was shinning the tulips were breaking through, the daffodils were opening and I was feeling happy to be alive. This week it was cold, and rainy or snowy all week. Saturday it got niceish again just to turn into a blizzard today. I am way sick of winter.

I got succored into being a soccer coach for my first grade daughters team. I swore this year I wouldn't do it. Ten "we are desperate for coaches" calls from the rec office later and I am the coach. We play 8 man soccer, I got a team with 8 girls, 2 of which have never showed up to practice 2 of the 6 who have come have asthma and can't run more than a couple of minutes without coughing up a lung. This week we practiced for 1/2 hour one day before the girls were shivering so hard they couldn't talk, so I called it a day. I cancelled the next practice since the field was covered in snow. Our games start next week, I feel like we are doomed.

So a week with no husband, no car, and no sun would be a tough pill for me to swallow. But add a mysteriously sick baby, a failing soccer team and a 3rd grader with a dirty mouth and I almost reached the breaking point. But luckily I didn't break. Just like it always does when I feel like I can't do it any longer something happens to lift me out of that hole. A couple things this week.

First of all I got to go out to dinner with my friends. I love to do this. I absolutely love this. It gives me a much needed rest away from the stresses and pressures of my life. There are no children, no husbands, no dirty dishes or stacks of laundry. I get to unwind, eat really good fattening food, and laugh and talk like a silly teenager again. It really is fun and does me a world of good. We go out about once a month usually but we skipped last month so I was really needing it. So that was a lifesaver.

Before going out to dinner we met at one of my friends house, while waiting for everyone to arrive I went inside and spent about 1/2 hour in her house. She is one of my best friends I really like being with her for a lot of reasons. One of which is her life is much harder than mine, while that may be a pretty tacky and callous thing to say, it is true. (That is probably the smallest reason - she really is great). But a half an hour in her house made me count my blessings, and this week I needed a little blessing counting.

On Thursday my husband decided to surprise me and come home early from work. Not just early like 6 or 7 but early like 3. It was amazing, I was shocked when he walked through the door. So we decided to go out. I called my sister in law Tess and asked her if she could spare a couple of hours to come and watch the kids. She readily agreed just like she always does and came and watched them. I was reminded how lucky I am to have the family I do. I have wonderful brothers, and sisters (in laws included) who have never been anything but kind and supportive. Each one of them is the "bend over backwards to help" kind of people, I am very blessed to be part of this family. Tess is my newest sister in law. She fits in so beautifully. My kids, especially my baby, lover her. In fact my baby watches out the window for her all the time even after I tell her, Tess isn't coming today. If ask, my baby will always tell you that Tess is her best friend. We are very blessed to have Tess and Kevin live near us. They are not just family they are friends.

My perfect husband took me to the temple on Thursday. A date to the temple isn't always top on my list. Not because I don't like being there but because we get so little talking time as it is that I usually like to spend every second of our dates talking his ear off and you can't do that in the temple. But I think the stress of the week left me feeling so overwhelmed and inadequate that I needed a little more than a fun evening out with my favorite person. I needed a good reminder of what it was all about. I was reminded.

We did sealings. I thought about my week, then I thought about the women I was representing. They were wives and mothers just like me. But instead of a just a hard week every now and again like I have to endure, they had lived their whole life and then waited for a century or more without the same sealing blessings I have enjoyed my whole life. My little stresses paled in comparison. Being with my family is the greatest gift I can ever hope to have. They are my next breath. Without them there would be no reason to go on. I imagine these women feel the same way about their families, especially one women who stood out to me. The joy and peace she must have felt at finally being sealed to her son must have been overwhelming. It must have been, because I felt it and it was for me. I count it a great privilege to have played a small role in that and to have caught a tiny glimpse of her joy. I came home renewed, refreshed and reminded.

Who is this Murphy fellow?

What is it with Murphy's laws. I am not sure who this Murphy fellow is or why he made such laws but I wish he wouldn't have. They seem to affect me all the time. Like just today I cleaned out my fridge. I hate cleaning my fridge, it is by far my least favorite job. I would rather scrub 1000 toilets then clean my fridge. But I did it today. It sure is empty now, I guess I should go shopping. Anyway cleaning the fridge isn't my point here so I will move on.

I was reminded of Murphy's laws while I was scrapping out the remains (which was a large percentage) of a chicken pot pie I had made for dinner a while ago. It was my very first chicken pot pie. I love pie but I prefer sweet fruit or pudding over chicken stew to be inside the crust. Anyway a while back my kids had watched the movie chicken run and learned about chicken pot pies. They have been asking me to make it ever since. So this week when asked what they wanted for dinner someone said chicken pot pie and the rest of my kids agreed I decided to go for it. I don't usually like to make things for dinner that I don't personally like so I had held off thus far on the pot pie. But I decided to sacrifice my own desires for theirs and make the pie, it also helped that I was going out for dinner with my friends that night. Anyway I googled it and found a recipe I though looked reasonable and made it. The crust turned out perfect. The last hundred pies or so I have made haven't been this successful. I love pie, it is my favorite dessert. I like the crust I make but for some reason I can never roll it out and get it on the pie plate in a perfect circle without having to patch little pieces here and there. Well this time I rolled out a absolute perfect circle, just the right size with no broken parts. I didn't even try hard or be extra careful or anything. It looked beautiful. It also baked to a perfect golden brown, flaky crust without burnt edges. Honestly I was pretty impressed with myself.

Well I was also pretty annoyed that this crust had to house chicken stew instead of apples and cinnamon, and also that no one but my kids (and maybe my husband) would see it. Most pies I make are for a holiday or when we have guests or to take to a church function or party. Anyway my children who were super excited to have chicken pot pie, tried it only to find they don't like chicken pot pie. My kind husband ate some and said he liked it, but today I threw most of that perfect crust away.

Anyway things like that seem to always happen to me. It doesn't matter how hard I try to make something turn out perfect, it only happens when it doesn't really matter how it looks. The same could be said about all kinds of things. My most successful ventures are always the most unimportant one while the important ones always flop.

I have to wonder why my kids only get sick after office hours, or they miraculously get better the moment we enter the Dr's office. Or the only days it rains is during vacations. Or why traffic is always at its worst when I am in a hurry. Or my favorite song comes on just after we pull in the driveway, but the traffic report is the only thing I hear while driving around. Or I am at my skinniest when I have the most zits and if my zits clear up I suddenly have no where to go. Or why my kids won't ever go to the bathroom in a toilet that hasn't been flushed but if there is a clogged toilet then they sit right down and go all over the mound of clogged toilet paper (and it is always the most disgusting smelliest kind). Or how the only time I lose my cool and scream at my kids is when someone is standing at my door knocking but I can't hear them over all the screaming and yelling. It is uncanny how these things always happen.

Even little things like trips to the grocery store. If I just spur of the moment decide to go everything always turns out ok. If I take the time to plan ahead, make a list, and read the ads, I can never find what I need, if I do it's not on sale and I forget half the most important things I came for.

If I take the time to bathe and dress the kids, and do their hair and put some make up on myself we never end up seeing anyone we know. But it's those times that I am in a hurry and just put a jacket on over my pajamas, and carry the kids out to the car without cleaning their faces, or putting their on shoes that we run into 1/2 our ward plus a least a couple of old friends I haven't seen for years.

If I take my baby to the bathroom right before we leave she will wet her pants when we get there. If I don't remember to make her go she is fine for hours. That is one thing I have never understood. How can the same child who can play all day long and only pee once a day when we are at home, have to go several times an hour when we are out. Honestly I think when they see a restroom sign at the store they start thinking about going to the bathroom, meanwhile I move on with my shopping until we reach the other end of the store then then kid realizes its more than a thought and he is dancing around holding himself. So I race back to the bathroom hoping to make it in time, sometimes I do sometimes I don't. Well then I of course ask, "anyone else need to go..., are you sure... even a little bit" the answer is always no. So we head back out to shop and when we have reached the furthest possible place from the bathroom the next kid has to go, so we start the race over again. With only 2 preschoolers you would think that would be the end of it and we could finally finish our shopping, but no I can always count on someone who needs to go back so they can poop. And they always seem to tell me this in their loudest possible voice in the most crowded area of the store. I am not kidding - this scenario is a common occurrence in my life and has been since my oldest was potty trained. Anyway although I am not a fan of this Murphy fellow I think he has got it spot on, anything that can possibly go wrong, does. You know I bet this Murphy isn't a fellow at all I bet he is Mom.

A date to IHOP

Each week my wonderful husband and I trade off taking one of our children out on a date. The kids really like this and so do we. Last week it was my oldest sons turn to go out with Dad. They went to Macey's and got a Kong Cone. That is what we did when it was my turn to take him out too. He just loves those Kong Cones. I am not sure if it is just the sheer challenge of eating so much ice cream in one sitting or the looks and comments he gets while carrying that mountain of ice cream around the store- but whatever it is he loves it. Those things are huge. I am guessing there is at least a quart of ice cream in those 7 swirls atop one giant cone. The drawback to the Kong Cone is that they won't dip them in chocolate. They say the ice cream will just fall off, I guess that may be true I have never tried it - but don't you think they could figure out a way, maybe they could just pour chocolate on the top. Dipped cones are so delicious.

Today was my turn to take our second son out. He choose to go to Ihop for breakfast. I was a bit surprised at his request but also excited. I love breakfast, actually I love every meal. But breakfast is the meal I am least likely to eat out - so going to a restaurant for breakfast is a special treat. The big drawback to "out for breakfast" is you have to get up really early. I set my alarm for 6:45, turns out I didn't really need to set it because I was so excited to go that I kept waking up and checking if it was time to get up yet, so I was wide awake and just laying there in bed waiting for my alarm to ring so I could get up and get ready. I opted for short "getting-ready" routine. I skipped the shower and pulled on the clothes I wore yesterday, went to the bathroom, tried to smear the smudges of yesterdays eye liner all the way across my eyes so it looked freshly applied. (didn't work- I just looked like I had black smudges under my eyes) and ran my fingers through my hair, which didn't help any. I then went to wake up my boy. He too was so excited that he just jumped out of bed - fully dressed, he had gotten dressed the night before so that he didn't have to "waste time" finding his clothes before we left. So all he had to do was slip on his shoes. He didn't even want to take the time to go to the bathroom. When I told him to, he just said "don't they have one there - I can wait"

As we got off on the exit we could see that the parking lot was full, he was a bit worried that they wouldn't have a table left. But as we pulled in we noticed that all the cars were on the other side of the lot, probably a park and ride spot or something. He was very relieved. The restaurant was empty we were the only ones there the whole time. The waitress asked me if I wanted a children's menu or an adults for him. I said one of each. Luckily he choose to order off the children's menu since the prices were about double what I expected. I guess it has been a long time since I have gone out for breakfast. Anyway he ordered french toast and bacon and I got Belgium waffles with strawberries and whipped cream. It was delicious. Very delicious. At home I would have opted for ice cream instead of whipped cream. Actually that is not true - I would have had both.

My son also ordered orange juice, his frugal mom got water. Water for breakfast is just wrong. But orange juice costs $3 a glass, so water it was. When the waitress asked him if he wanted juice I quickly tried to think of a way to get him to say no without it seeming like he wasn't allowed to have it. One rule on our dates is they get to order whatever they want. But $3 for a glass of juice is ridiculous. I could buy 3 cans of frozen Oj for about $3. I figured Ihop orange juice is about 12 times more expensive than grocery store orange juice. It sure didn't taste 12 times as good, in fact it wasn't that good at all. A little on the sour side and not at all cold. I like my juice with little ice crystals it it. This was like room temp with a couple ice cubes floating in it. But oh well, money is money and the privilege of going out with mom and drinking $3 lukewarm, sour orange juice is something that will hopefully make him feel special. And helping him feel special is what it is all about.

Things Not Seen

My oldest son's 4th grade class was assigned to read Things not Seen. He had been reading it for several weeks. We knew about this because part of our weekly family home evening routine includes a book report. We go around the room and each person has 30 seconds to tell the family about what books they are reading. This is supposed to encourage literacy and a love for reading. Well his teacher gives the class a few minutes in class to read each day. He apparently thought that was sufficient so he hadn't brought the book home to read like the rest of the class. He was way behind. Well our little chat with his teacher during parent teacher confrences motivated him to spend several hours reading this weekend. I decided to read the book too. So one evening I read it. I enjoyed it. It is about a 15 year old boy who wakes up invisible. His clothes show up on this invisible body which is determental in keeping people from seeing him, so he runs around trying to solve the mystery of his invisiblenss in the buff. While going naked is a pretty logical thing for someone in this situation to do I am not sure the author needs to dwell on it and constantly remind us of his nakedness. It even gets more interesting when he meets and falls in love with a blind girl. Luckily the girl can't see his naked body. That would be a bit much for me. But she is aware of it. I am a bit naive but not so much to not recognize that this puts an interesting dimension into their relationship. What 15 year old boy could run around completely naked with his girlfriend and not be affected. And even if she can't see him I bet her imagination was working pretty well. Anyway I think I would have rated this book a little higher on the "appropriate for 10 year olds" scale if there would have been more clothes involved or at least less talk of nakedness. There was also a few words used pretty commonly that are not allowed in our house. While most of the world probably doesn't find them offensive, I do. Anyway the book was pretty interesting and fairly well written. I am just not sure I am ready for my 10 year old to read about teenagers falling in love even if it is not the main topic of the book. I wouldn't go so far as to say I would forbid him to read it (I didn't) but I just think I would have thought twice about assigning it to my 4th grade class. I hope this doesn't make me sound like a prude, I'm not really. I just don't know why he can't enjoy a good Little house, or Anne of Green Gables book. I enjoy the innocence of children - I'd like to keep them that way as long as I can.

I've got some pretty smart kids

Last week was parent teacher conferences. I usually look forward to this time of year because it means we get a day off of school. I also like to meet with my kids teachers and since I have very smart kids it boosts my ego to hear how well they are doing. Well this term two of the three kids had walking report cards. I hate those, I feel so cheated. What a waste of time. We have to go around to several stations where we watch our kids do math problems, read to us and do various other things they have been learning. The purpose is so we as parents can see what are kids know. Well maybe that is beneficial to deadbeat parents who don't pay any attention to their kids. But I live with my kids, I talk to them on a daily basis. I help them do their homework or at least check it when they are done. I listen to them read every day -I already know what they know. What I don't know is how they are behaving at school, are they fitting in with the other kids, or are they keeping up with everyone else. I really want to know if they are the smartest kid in the class but it is tacky to come right out and ask that. I thought about not going to the walking report cards but that would make me look like a bad mother- so I went.

The walking report cards pretty much lived up to my expectations of a waste of time but the one teacher I did get to meet with opened my eyes to some issues my oldest son is having in the 4th grade. He loves school, he loves his teacher, he loves his friends. He doesn't' so much like to do homework and he has some pretty good rationalizing skills when it comes to explaining why he isn't doing his homework. First of all they don't have all that much homework and when his teacher says he can do it either at home or at school he just always chooses to do it at the place he is currently not in. 4th grade is a bit different than the younger grades. The teachers expect the kids to be a bit more independent, keeping track of what is due when all by themselves. I thought that sounded like a pretty good idea so I let him take the reigns when it comes to getting his work done. His driving skills need some work. But all in all he is doing pretty well. He spent several hours catching up a few things this weekend and now we should be back on track. School can be exhausting, I can't wait for summer.

A good Mom

Last week we were out of ice cream, which is an essential, and the kids wanted to spend their report card money. My kids respond well to bribes, I'd rather bribe than threaten so it is the main system of motivation at the Carter house, one such bribe is money for doing well on their report card. This term all three of my children did varying degrees of well and all received varying amounts of money for their efforts. It had been almost a whole 24 hours since parent teacher conferences and the money had almost burned a whole in their pocket. The constant nagging and begging of "please can we go to the store now," was giving me a headache. I figured there was only two ways to stop the pounding in my head either eat some ice cream, or take them to the store. I would have opted for the first but we were out of ice cream so we headed to Walmart. We made it into the store without anyone getting hit by a car in the parking lot, always a major accomplishment. We headed for the toy section. Each of my three school kids found a toy they wanted and miraculously it was in their price range. I did have to have a little chat with my 6 year old about the importance of modesty even for Barbie. Amazingly enough she put back the string bikini barbie and choose one with a very low cut ball gown, but it did have sleeves she pointed out (even though the sleeves were removable). I counted this as a step in the right direction and we headed for the grocery section. By this time my baby was just finishing up her regular temper tantrum about riding in the cart so things were looking up. I think my kids must absorb sugar by osmosis, for some reason just walking down the cookie island sends them into sugar rush and they are bouncing off the walls, begging for treats, wrestling with each other or holding races down the aisles. So we barely make it out of the cookie row with my sanity intact. We were starting down the ice cream row when I had to turn around and stop an argument about which was better sherbet or cookies and cream when I hear my baby ask if we can make cake now for family home evening. I turned and looked at her and she was holding an egg, "see," she said, "now we have eggs". So I carefully pried her little fingers (which were very sticky) off the egg and put it back in the carton. Just then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was an olderish woman. She quietly said. You are a good mom. I rolled my eyes and laughed saying no I was just a good actor. She said, "No I can tell you are a good mom" then she walked away. Well somehow that little compliment or perhaps it was just a sly tactic to help me keep my temper in check, made my day. The more I think about it I think it was just a ploy- she could probably sense I was about to explode. But either way it helped. I finished my shopping, assured my baby we would make cake for family home evening and got everyone to the car without so much as a frown on my face. I didn't even have to open the ice cream that night.

Triumph with a Disney Quiz

Yesterday I enjoyed a rare moment of triumph. I stumped my family with a quiz question from a Disney movie. Every once in a while I come up with a tidbit of knowledge I think I am the only one who knows. Usually my genius husband guessing it right off, but not this time. The question was what movie does the Disney princess Faline come from. The clues were, she is a Disney princess, the movie was made a long long time ago, it was one of Disney's first movies. They guessed and guessed and couldn't come up with the right response. I even offered to pay them 50 cents and still no winners. I finally told them. They were kind of sore losers, they accused me of cheating saying a deer is not a princess. But the fact is the movie states that Bambi's Dad is the King of the Forest and Bambi is the prince. In fact I think the movie begins with the great news that the prince is born. Well Faline marries Bambi and when you marry a Prince you become a Princess. I win, I win, I win- I outsmarted my family, I just wish I could do that more often.

Saint Patricks Day Fun

Well every year as March 17th approaches my kids start talking about leprechauns and green. They get so excited. I am not sure St. Patricks day is really a holiday we should celebrate. After all we aren't Irish or Catholic and green is pretty much on the bottom of my favorite color list, but my kids love it so we celebrate. We of course all wear green. We put out a little green bag for the leprechauns to fill with candy and hide for us. We eat green food and I tell the same old St. Patricks day story about Chancy the Leprechauns and we go to bed dreaming of pots of gold at the end of rainbow. Well this year was no different. Green outfits were chosen well in advance and carefully laid out the night before, or in the case of my daughter put on under her pajamas. The green bag was hung on the door knob and the green food in the fridge. I mentioned all this to a friend who actually started laughing and asked why we celebrate St. Patricks day. She said don't you have enough to do to worry one more holiday. I thought about it for a while and discussed it with my very supportive husband. He said "ya know, I don't think St. Patricks day is really all that important, but the traditions we have with the kids are." I whole heartedly agree. The kids do love it and after all how hard is it to squeeze a couple of drops of food color in the pancake batter. So come March 17th I donned my green shirt, my wonderful husband whipped us up some delicious green pancakes and my kids searched for the bag of candy the leprechauns had hidden. Turns out the leprechaun who had thought he was a pretty tricky hider - wasn't. The kids immediately found it inside the piano. Dinner that night was our traditional St. Patricks day fare. Green jello, peas, green koolaide, green noodles (I buy the tri colored ones and pick out the green ones) green Alfredo sauce, toasted bread slathered with green butter and mint chocolate chip ice cream. (Sometimes I make green rolls and key lime pie-too lazy this year) I went to bed reflecting on my children's joy and feeling like a good mom. A good mom with green hands.

Draper Temple Dedication

My wonderful husband and I took our two oldest sons to the Draper Temple dedication today. I had vacillated all day about going. My two youngest children are sick and the baby (she is actually 2 and convinced she is a big girl - but will always be my baby) was up all night. I had really wanted to go and experience this with my boys but felt guilty about leaving my sick kids home with a friend. I finally decided to just do it. I made them promise not to cough or let snot come out of their nose. I tylenoled them up and dropped them off praying no one would notice they were sick. Well I did spend quite a bit of time worrying about them but other than that had a truly marvelous experience. We watched the dedication from our Stake Center. This is the third dedication I have been to. I watched the Navuoo, also from the stake center and then attended the Portland Temple in the temple. All three were very memorable experiences. President Monson related a story about LaGrand Richards attending the Salt Lake Temple dedication as a child and had shared the story with him. President Monson reminded the youth how they would always have this memory to share with their children and grandchildren. It made me reflect on my own childhood dedication experience. It was the Portland temple and I was about 13. My Dad was in the choir and got to stand right behind the prophet. The rest of my family were in sealing room 7 watching it on TV. I remember being impressed and making a commitment to come back to the temple when I was old enough. I hope my boys had a similar experience. The spirit was strong and reminded me how blessed I am to have had the opportunity to be sealed to my family, and that I can go to the temple whenever I want. It is a privilege I fear I take for granted.

How this blog got its name

Many of you may wonder at "rise and shout the carers are out" it is kind of an odd name for a blog. So let me tell you how I came up with this. I wanted a name that invoked strong feelings of unity, and family pride. I wanted it to be witty and original. I thought for a while and couldn't really come up with anything. Well my boys sometimes need a little convincing to get them out of bed in the morning so I often come in to wake them up singing the BYU fight song. I change the word "cougars" to carters, and "fame and glory" to "eternal glory". Kind of cheesy I know but it gives my boys something to laugh at me over. I always get the same response as I come in singing this song. Ahhh mom STOP as they are pulling the sheets over their head to block me from tickling or kissing them and putting their hands over their ears. They are eventually bugged enough by my singing and cheesyness that they get up. So as I was singing this I thought there is my blog name - luckily no one had taken it (big surprise huh) so my fabulous blog was born.

Lessons in Life

Throughout my life I have made a lot of decisions - some good, some bad and some that have been a little bit of both. I have also come up with a lot of ideas, schemes and projects, some of which proved worthwhile, and some certainly did not. Today's post is about one project I consider one of the harder undertaking of my life and also one of the most beneficial.

Not long after my husband graduated we bought a house. A house is quite a big purchase that should be considered carefully. After living in little apartments for almost 6 years we were definitely ready for a house of our own but our bank account may not have fully agreed. We bought one anyway. It was a brand new 2400 sq foot spec home in a new development. We loved our house but felt it needed a bit more to become our home. So have spent the last 7 years making it into a home. Since our bank account was pretty none existent at this point this project required a lot of manual labor on our part. This (manual labor) is one of those decisions I definitely had moments of regret over. Our house was newly built and did not come with grass. So one of our first chores in the house to home transformation was to add a yard, we decided a house needed a bit of grass and hopefully a few flowers to make it a home. So we began that long horribly tedious job of landscaping.

We first had to remove the rocks. Our home was built in an old gravel pit. I am not really sure why they abandoned this gravel pit and sold it to a home builder because there is still an over abundance of rock to harvest. Perhaps they got tired of the wind or moved onto bigger and better things. Whatever the case may be we bought a home with move rock than dirt surrounding it. We removed the rock and traded it for dirt. We had to buy dirt, I had never thought of dirt as something you buy before. I always assumed it was just one of those things found all over the earth that was essential to farms and a curse to carpet cleaning housewives. But we bought 3 dump truck loads of dirt, for a pretty penny I might add.

We then dug trenches and laid sprinkler pipes then covered them up again. For some reason it kept snowing during the pipe laying process this caused on trenches to fill in again. So we had to re dig, and re dig and re dig. This was not a very fun process. I did learn a valuable lesson though. A pick ax is one of the best tools ever invented. It is extremely handy for digging trenches, removing rocks and getting your frustrations out. It also helps the muscles on the back of your arms to hurt.
After we got our pipes in and our trenches filled back in with very expensive dirt we decided to add some grass. We though about seeding, but worried it wouldn't grow. Then we thought about hydroseeding. The experts say this is a sure fire way to get your seed to grow. They come and spray this green looking gunk all over your yard and in just a few weeks little sprouts of grass appear. Sounded ok but lots of our neighbors hydroseeded yards seemed to have more weeds than grass. So we opted for the real sure fire way to get grass. We just paid (again a pretty penny) for someone to cut up a bunch of beautiful green weed free grass in little squares and bring it to us. We laid the sod and presto chango-we had grass. My insightful husband commented we went from trailer trash to a respectable family in 2 hours. Grass really does something for a yard.



Well the next step in our yard development was a fence. A fence can be seen as two different things. First a way to keep things in and second a way to keep things out. I had 3 (at the time) precious little babies I wanted to keep around. I wanted them to enjoy the fruits of our landscaping labors but I didn't want them roaming the neighborhood. So a fence seemed like a good idea. So we began installing one. It was one of those white vinyl easy to install do it your selves kinda things. It took all summer. We just aren't that handy when it comes to fence installation apparently. But we finally got it up and it looked really good. The wind took it down a couple times but we found a way to screw it into place and all was well. I sat back and once again enjoyed the fruits of our labor. The kids played in the yard for hours on end. Then I began to notice they were getting lonely and so was I. All of the neighborhood friends that would drift over to play with us somehow got stopped by the fence and were finding other places to play. The fence was keeping my kids in but my friends out. I began to doubt my fence decision. So the question that plagued my mind for the first few years of fence ownership has been is it better to keep my kids in (with little effort on my part) while risking loneliness due to isolation, or risk insanity by chasing my kids around the neighborhood while enjoying an occasional drifting in of the neighbors. I have gone back and forth on this.

At times I concluded that getting a fence was the smartest choice I have ever made and then a few weeks later it is on my list of regrets. Well why do I bring this up now. Because yesterday we had a beautiful spring day, I was out playing with my kids in the backyard and the thought came up again. I realized I am smarter than I had once feared. I am now very confident that a fence was a valuable asset to my life. I still have all five kids and I do contribute that in part to the fence keeping them in. (For proof of this stay tuned to future posts where I relate several losing kid stories - for some reason I have a bad habit of losing someone when we on vacation) My kids have grown old enough to have friends who can drift in over the fence or through the gate so now we often have more neighborhood kids in my yard then I can count on both hands. The last and most important reason is it has allowed me to really play with my kids (and husband) in ways I wouldn't be brave enough to do with the whole neighborhood watching. (We have one neighbor who I am fairly convinced is Mrs. Kravitz cousin.)

We have had a lot of good times behind that fence. From wrestling competitions and soccer games, to paper macheing projects and cub scout activities, from neighborhood bbq's and enrichment dinners, to seat wars on the tramp and sun bathing, from birthday party pinatas and water fights, good times and happy memories have found there way into our back yard. While some of those things could have easily been done without a fence, others most likely would have never happened. For example, while the sight of me flying down the slip in slide is not one I am comfortable sharing it sure does make for some fun memories. We have had some pretty tense moments back there too, like the time we decided to build a fire and roast marshmallows. We had forgotten how windy it gets, after a few minutes of pretending the smoke in our face was fun and the flying sparks probably start a fire we packed it up and ate our graham crackers and chocolate bars inside. My stalwart husband stayed out and braved the cold and smoke to keep an eye and the hose on the flying sparks.

Some other unforgettable memories are laying out on the tramp late at night and star gazing. We have done this several times the latest of which was this week. The mother in me fought back the guilt associated with allowing my kids to be up and out so late on a school night, while the mom in me realized that these moments can be far and few between so we laid out there huddled under blankets giggling, wishing on falling stars and hopefully making some memories.

There is now no doubt in my mind that the hours and hours of back breaking sweat producing work required to change our dirt yard into the lovely memory making haven it is today was well worth it. Those hours were some of the best investments ever made. In truth those hours made some pretty important memories in and of themselves.

The yard was barely in and ready for its first mowing when I decided it was time to start in on our next home making project - the basement. My very patient husband did not really agree but humored me anyway and bought some books on framing and started sawing and hammering. Looking back we definitely should have invested in a air compressor and a nail gun. But you live and learn. The basement was a long time coming. Between his job, his calling, and his fatherly responsibilities my very wonderful husband had little time to play Bob the builder. I tried to hurry the project along by helping all I could. Which wasn't much. I mostly held things and fetched tools and kept the kids away. But every once in a while I decided (always regrettably) to do something myself such as frame the walls for the hallway. After spending all day measuring, sawing and hammering I got the hallway up and I was very exhausted, sore and proud (I should mention I was about 7 months pregnant). When my amazing husband came home from work I hurried to show off my work. He hemmed and hawed a bit and praised me for my hard work then changed his clothes tore it all down and stared over insisting that a wall really should be straight and at least semi level. Well long story short thanks to my wonderful husband and a mud and tape man - we now have a basement (except for the bathroom that doubles for a storage room).


While the work, worry and stress that went in to building that basement seemed never ending so have the benefits both of having one and building it. We have played, worked and grew in the basement. The process of building that basement gave us the opportunity to work as a team. It grew my husbands patience and self control. He never once yelled or threw a hammer at me although I often deserved it. It broadened my horizons and taught me important lessons in work ethics. I learned a job worth doing is worth doing well. I learned you should wear rubber shoes when working with electricity (fortunately this lesson was learned through lecture and not experience) I learned you shouldn't leave a very heavy wall standing in a middle of the kids playroom without anchoring it down (unfortunately this was an experience lesson). I learned my husband is very resourceful and truly a jack of all trades. I learned we can accomplish a lot if we work together, I learned we make a pretty good team, I learned building a home is a big part of building a family.

Who I am

I think I should introduce myself. I have a husband, who I adore. He really is awesome. He is funny and kind and witty and a very hard worker. He knows how to put people at ease, therefore he is usually well liked. He is a great dad, the kids love him, (although they love me more-just ask them, I do on a regular basis (I need the self esteem boost)). He is my best friend, I could go on and on but will undoubtedly write more about him later. We like things to be orderly so we decided on the 2 year plan for family expansion. We have 5 kids 10, 8,6,4,2. 3 of which are boys and 2 girls. My children are my whole life ( I am actually crying now thinking about how to describe them) they truly are wonderful. I have been blessed beyond belief. I live in a smallish town in Utah. My husband works at some computer type of job that fascinates him and bores me. He likes it and is very good at it. I stay home. My job is to take care of the kids and the house - sometimes I do it sometimes I don't. We have never had a major catastrophe on my watch so I guess I do a passable job. As for how I feel about it, I love it. I wouldn't trade it for anything. If I had to have a job I think I would be a cpa or a nurse or a travel agent. But I hope never to have a job. I love staying home with my kids and have enough to do that I linger on the edge of insanity, adding a job would probably push me over that edge. Also I don't like to be told what to do, (Unfortunately this is one of the few traits my children have inherited from me.) so having a boss wouldn't work well for me. So for those reasons my chosen profession is a stay at home mom. I have 4 brothers, 1 sister, 5 sister in laws, 1 brother-in-law and two of the best parents ever. I was mostly raised in Oregon, lived in Arizona for about 18months, then moved on to go to school at BYU. My plan was to graduate, get married and move away from Utah. Accomplished the first 2, still working on the third. I think I should clarify this. I really like Utah. The mountains are beautiful, there are lots of great outdoorish things to do here. I have wonderful neighbors and friends. I have liked my kids school experiences so far. Except for a couple little things like the ocean is far away and it is- Utah - I really like living here. I am going to have to ponder the topic of why Utah isn't my the place I want to spend my entire life and get back to you on that one because in all sincerity I don't know - I just know it is not. My family is spread out all over the country, this is one of the parts of my life I regret the most I love each of them and would love to be near them all - but I don't see that happening anytime soon. I teach the CTR 6 class at church, which I like, and am the bear den leader, which I love. As for hobbies and talents, I have some hobbies and since I believe God blessed us all with talents I haven't given up searching for mine. I love to run. I am not good at it at all, but I really enjoy it. It makes me feel free, and strong and happy. Last year I ran a marathon - it was a very long ways but I finished it and am very proud to have done so. I also like to read, travel, camp, hike, swim, snorkel, and pretty anything done outside I enjoy. Except skiing - I don't do anything where I put myself on a slippery surface. With this list of hobbies you could assume I am a reasonably healthy, trim woman - which might be true if I didn't have such a passion for food. I love to eat, when it comes to food I have absolutely zero self control. Someday I might be brave enough to post a picture of me, I probably should because I have often heard that peoples imaginations tend to be worse than the real thing. Like when a scary movie never shows the monster, it is always just lurking right out of view forcing the viewer to imagine what it looks like. And usually the imagination comes up with something far more hideous than it really is. So I think I will post a picture of myself. I will have to get my husband to take one of me (he is a photographer - kind of) I am not really all that old, but not that young either. That is about it.

I decided to post the scariest most unflattering picture I could find of myself. I have learned that to avoid disappointment you should always set your expectations low. This way if you ever actually see me you may be pleasantly surprised.

Why a blog.

I am kind of a closet person. Not about everything, just some things. Like coke. I really like to drink it but I don't like my kids to see me, so I hide. My favorite spot is in the garage-mostly because of ease of access. In the winter I keep a case of coke in there . The other spot I like is in the bathroom downstairs. It is not your normal bathroom, since there is not toilet, sink or shower there are no bathroom germs or smells or anything. It is mostly a storage room. Lately it has become a bit trickier to really enjoy my coke in there because we have been storing more stuff. I have to stand in just the right spot and suck my stomach in to get the door closed, once the door is closed I can exhale a bit and shift around. I can prop myself up against a futon we will most likely never use again but hang onto just in case. I can then relax and enjoy my can of coke, but not for too long because the futon leg happens to hit right about my head so I kind of have to hold my head at a funny angle to avoid being hit in the head. This kind of krinks my neck - but I can handle it. I often wonder why I love coke so much. I always get the diet caffine free kind, that means there is no sugar and no caffine. Since sugar or caffine are the ingredients usually associated with addictions I wonder what I am addicted too. I read the label to find out. Water, that is definately not it since I have to force myself to drink it. Carmel color-maybe-I like a lot of things that are the color of carmel. Aspartame, if I am correct I believe that is the stuff that makes it sweet. I think it is a chemical that causes cancer. I might be addicted to that but I hope not, I better find out because if that turns out to be the case I better purchase the cancer insurance the phone saleslady offered me yesterday. Phosphoric acid -never heard of that, think I will skip that one. Potassium benzoate - I actually have a feeling it is this one. I don't think it is widely known, but potassium benzoate protects taste, taste is very important to me- I could definately be addictided to a taste protector. Natural flavors - everything contains those and since I am not addicted to everything I must not be addicted to natural flavors. Citiric acid, since it is used to add a sour taste I think I can rule that one out. Well I have really gotten off on a tangent here I better get back to the topic at hand which is why I am writing this blog. I have been reading blogs for a while now. I like reading all kinds of blogs and I guess you could say I have had blog envy for a while. But I have been afraid to start one because I don't really want anyone to read it. I am not sure if there is too much purpose in writing a blog you don't want anyone reading but I decided to do it anyway. So I decided to make a blog and change all names and not let anyone know about it, (except my husband just saw and already laughed at me for it-so that plan is out) so I believe that makes me a closet blogger. What am I planning to blog about - nothing to exciting. I plan to write the truth mostly, and mostly nothing interesting ever happens. So here goes.. I guess I have suceeded in writing my first blog. I actually have lots of other blog enteries already written in my head. You see for the last few months I have kept a blog in my head and have carefully kept notes on a piece of notebook paper I keep hidden in my drawer. Maybe I will record some of those little musings. I don't know if anyone wil ever read these enteries. You know how we are supposed to keep a journal because some day our great grand kids will find it intersting. I think my great grand kids might find me kind of interesting, but mostly they will probably find me embarressing. Oh well I will be dead.